Goodbye, pet doggy

I glance quickly at the bag of dog food leaning against the pantry door and I squeeze tightly the pink collar between my fingers. I keep the small plate engraved with your name mati.

The food is still untouched in the bowl.

I brought you home wrapped up in a flannel blanket twelve years ago, you were the surprise on Duarte’s birthday.

A little ball of serene brown fur and calm heart, among a restless litter of yellow and black Labradors. I picked you up and held you against my chest. From that moment on, you became ours. From the beginning, there were marks on the stools feet, a new rug for the living-room after two months, chewed up shoes and toys.

You were there while our family grew, the birth of the children. You smelled the little hands, and licked sometimes a little foot and a cheek.  “They are kisses”, Tete used to say.

A nossa cadelinhaA nossa cadelinhaA nossa cadelinha

When they started to walk, you sat attentively and you ran with each fall, like a mother holding its baby. You were gentle “stealing” cookies from the chubby hands and sharing bread with marmalade with Mada. You were a horsey, a pillow, a ball companion, a stuffed toy, a soft and comforting support to my children, to us.

My darling companion of study marathons. You laid down at my feet while I breastfed my babies throughout the night

I laid you down on my lap, hugged you tightly like on the first day, gave you lots of kisses and cuddles, my old lady… and let you go.

I cry softly.

How am going to tell the kids that you are not sitting by the door today?

Thank you Pau Storch for the photo edition.

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